Saturday, March 6, 2021

How to Identify Paradoxes in Your Life (2021)

Hello! If you’re reading this, then I must’ve invited/challenged you to identify paradoxes in your life. Congratulations! 


Here’s what I mean by paradox - any situation that involves contradictions that must be lived rather than solved. Kinda abstract, right? Ok, some examples:


  • I love lying in bed, but the only way I’m able to fall asleep is if I get up and do things during the day. I love being active in the day, but the only way I’m able to be productive is by lying in bed all night.

  • I love being social, but also, other people are an inconvenience. I love being alone, but also, it gets lonely.

  • In relationships, it’s important to be yourself, and it’s important to be flexible for your partner.


Each of the above could be posed as a dilemma:

  • To stay in bed or get up?

  • To be alone or be with others?

  • To stay myself or change for someone else?


To embrace paradox is to realize-- these are all false dilemmas!


What I am calling a paradox is any situation in which the only way to lose is by picking one side once and for all. The only way to win is to figure out how to live with the contradictions (or tensions) rather than solve them. 


So, to identify paradoxes in your life, pay attention to:

  • Situations in which you feel forever torn

  • Situations in which you find yourself going in circles

  • Situations in which you keep trying to find some kind of balance/rhythm


These could be intrapersonal, personal, interpersonal, mundane, spiritual, domestic, professional, or pretty much any other sphere of life.





1 comment:

  1. Short version inspired by a friend: "Anything that's a blessing and a curse, so it's a difficult thing but also you shouldn't try to resolve/be rid of it."

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